Been awhile

  So Cayden started the 3rd grade this year and he LOVES his teacher.  He has Mr. Bachman this year, he is fantastic.  He works well with Cayden and his needs, which in return, Cayden brought home a great report card.  He had all A's and 2 B's, he was not happy with his B's but he had one proud Momma.  He like's school for the most part and has come along way since I last posted, I am so glad that I fought the fight to get him his IEP.  He has been big into read Junie B Jones books lately and has proved to me that he can finish a book in 2 days.  I am so proud of his accomplishments.
  We are going through some more testing right now, because it has been brought to my attention that he should really go through the testing for Aspergers, so we are in the process of that.  He has met with the Child Pychologist and she called to let me know that she is pretty sure that he has it but would like to have one more session with him before confirming, so we go back Feb. 1. 
   He sleeps with me when Jim works nights and the other night he fell asleep with Chloie is his arms talking to her, it was super cute.  Although at times I feel pushed to my limit, I love this little boy more than words can explain, he is my everything and I would be lost without him.  Cayden lost his 7 year old little cousin to cancer a couple weeks ago and it was pretty hard for him, but with that loss it makes you grab your little one and hold them just a little tighter, a little bit of a reality check really.  I LOVE the random texts from him saying "I love you mommy"  I couldnt ask for a better son, he's it.  I sit at work as I write this missing him more than ever, and I just got that text.  I am super excited for Christmas because I love to see him glow with excitment, and I cant wait to spend the week off with him. 
   His goal is still to be a cop when he gets big.  Sometimes with the attitude that comes out of that little man I wonder what kind of cop he will be, one that I wouldnt want to run across on a bad day, and then there are times when he has the biggest heart ever that I wonder if he'd let everyone go because he'd feel sorry for them.  He cares so much about what other people think and feel.  He loves animals so much that I often wonder if he wont change his mind eventually and want to be a vet or someone who works with animals.  I could see this. 
  Well thats about it for now, I will try to update more often from here.

Nothings right

  So yesterday I got home from work at 8 after working a 36 hour shift, I was tired so layed down for a nap.  At 8:45 my phone was ringing and I seen it was School, I answered and it was Cayden.  He says Mom I need you to bring me a new pair of socks these socks are bothering me and I cant do my work.  I told him to take his socks off for now until I could get there with some new ones.  Long story short, Cayden has always had to have his socks just right, the seam of the sock needs to run perfect along the front of his toes.  So I slept for a little while then got up and brought him some new socks.  The school I think thought I was crazy that I was bringing him a new pair of socks, this relates back to my first post where I said no one understands.  After explaining to them that he has a major OCD problem when it comes to his toes, to the point where if we are walking and he can feel a fuzzy off his socks between his toes he stops to take it out, they stated that they didnt realize that.   He also had on a Polo shirt yesterday and for some reason yesterday did not like his shirt, from what I could get out of him I think he felt to exposed, he didnt like that the buttons came down in the front and people could see part of his chest. As my title states yesterday nothing was right for my poor little man. 

   I had a friend tell me today that she was at a class yesterday and they touched on Autism, and she told me that as much as she talks to me and I tell her over and over again she still doesnt understand what I go through everyday and that she probably never will.  Again no one understands, people can say they undersatand and pretend to understand but NO ONE will fully understand until they have walked in these shoes.  People are always quick to judge but these are the same people that I secretly despise because their lives really seem so simple compared to what we go through everyday.  Some people take what they have for granted and I would give anything for Cayden to be able to live a simple life like that.  I love my son to death and wouldn't trade him for the world, he is my everything.  Cayden is going with his Dad tonight, he goes to his Dads every other weekend, so for them 4 days a month, I really can say, I am lost.  I am lost because I have so much free time and me time that I dont usually get that I dont know what to do with myself 3/4 of the time, I walk around in a daze and miss him like crazy.  I worry about him constant when he is not with me because I really dont even believe that his Dads family understands because they dont live it but 4 days a months, pretending to understand doesnt work. 
Thats all for now. 

Thanks for reading, one proud Momma

Report Card

   So Cayden's report card came home from school, he had a good report card, I am very proud of him.  Although I am a little confused to how they grade him, is he grade on the work he should be doing or the work he is actually doing.  He is in Special Ed. now and does different work than the rest of his class.  Why I ask is because his lowest grade was in Spelling but yet he goes to Special Ed for Spelling and has brought home 100% on his last 7 Spelling tests, and Spelling was his lowest grade.  I was also told at Parent teacher Conferences that he excels in Math and has no issues in Math at all, but yet on his report card she stated that he needs improvement in some areas.  I'm confused to how they can tell me one thing and then come report card time its stating something completely different.  Either way I have seen his work coming home and I have never been blindsided by a bad grade so I'm a little confused.  I guess the school will be getting a call from me later today. 

   We had a good weekend, he rode his 4 wheeler alot this weekend and my Dad got his brakes fixed so thats a good thing, he can use his foot brake now.  He hasn't been going to bed until late after 10 almost every night one night was 1am (yes it was a school night) which is not his normal so I'm a little confused and trying to figure out what has changed to caused this.  One thing with Cayden is that it takes me a long time to get him settled for the night, and if once he's settled and something interupts that it takes a LONG time to get him to settle back down.  He does take pills at night to help him sleep but I see no difference in when he takes them to when he doesnt.  The pill does not help him fall asleep but helps him stay sleeping when he does fall asleep, I dont think it works because I see no difference.  The night he didnt go to bed until 1am he was up 3 times between then and 6am.  Anyways something I will bring up to the Dr. at our next appt.

   Cayden starts Spring Break in 2 weeks and he cant not wait.  The weekend that break starts is the weekend we can move our camper into our campsite so I think him and I will be doing some camping that week, crossing my fingers for some nice weather. 

   Well thats about it for now, thanks for reading.  Emie

A Quiet Day

  Mom and I went shopping to get some things for the wedding so Dad went to get Cayden from school.  He was really excited to see Grandpa there instead of Mom.  Cayden and my Dad have a bond like I never even had with my Dad, Grandpa is the world to Cayden and he thinks Grandpa does no wrong.  It makes me so happy to see the bond that they share, even though Grandpa doesnt know how to say "No", Cayden has Grandpa wrapped around his little finger that is for sure.  Cayden wanted to come home right away and ride his 4 wheeler and for some reason it wasnt starting so of course Grandpa came over to figure out what was wrong and worked on it for 2 hours and the 4 wheeler was up and running so Cayden got to ride for awhile. 
  Well thats all for tonight, its bath time and then bed time so I dont have to drag him out of bed in the morning like I had to this morning (he takes after his Mom in that aspect, not a morning person at all).

Thanks for reading, Emie

Snow Day

  We got a ton of snow last night, which included Sleet, Hail, rain and Thunder and Lightning.  Jim was working nights and Cayden was freaking out because of the lightning and thunder.  He finally fell asleep around 11p and slept with me all night and got up around 8am.  He was pretty excited to have a snow day today. 
  He is now convinced that he can go outside to ride his 4 wheeler.  The snow is blowing sideways with winds of up to 50mph.  Im pretty sure if I did let him go out it wouldnt last long, but I'm afraid he'll blow away.  He is now in the bedroom putting puzzels together.  I was watching him play with the dog this morning and it is so cute to watch him play with her.  She is a 100lb, 1 year old Great Dane and he considers her his best friend.  He tells her all the time how much he loves her and calls her sweetie.  He was laying on top of her and she just lays there, it was priceless.  Then him and Chloie were pretending that they had their own childrens show, Cayden was the director of course, it was cute. He kept saying "Ok Children (talking to Chloie), Paco did something we did not like, so do we tell him we didnt like it or do we fight with him, thats right boys and girls we use our words", it was super cute.  The poor dog just goes along with it.
   Well thats our morning so far, I dont think we are wandering anywhere outside of the house today so it should be interesting trying to keep him occupied in the house while Jim tries to sleep.  Wish me luck.

Thanks for reading, Emie

He's 9 already.

  So I have decided that I am going to start blogging, I know my baby is 9 already but I will be blogging on what it is like to have Aspergers, ADHD and ODD in our lives. 

   So my baby turned 9, I cant believe how the time has flown by.  I love my son more than anything, he is my world.  We have everyday struggles but nothing we can't handle.  Cayden was diagnosed with ADHD, ODD, and Seperation Anxiety in 2006 at 4 years old.  This past year after more testing he was diagnosed with Aspergers, Emotional disorder and Anxiety.  This has been a long road for us but we manage.  Discipline is not handled the same, we compromise.  Everyday little tasks are handled differently, we accomplish little bits at a time.  Bedtime is handled differently, well bedtime just plain sucks (his body does not slow down enough for him to fall asleep by himself so I have to lay with him with my arm over him so he calms down enough to let his body attempt to relax) his body moves ALL night long.  These are only SOME of the things that we do differently than other households with children his age.  

   Some of my struggles are that some people just dont get it.  Until they walk a day in my shoes or shoes similar to mine, they wont get it.  There are comments made all the time about my child being a brat, spoiled, or my lack of parenting skills.  This hurts, but I know I try my best and I have done my research, more research and more research, and I understand the horrible effects, feelings and outbursts that he experiences and that to me is all that matters, no one else NEEDS to understand it.  Do I wish they would?  Absolutely, but I understand that not all people will.

   Cayden was just placed in Special Ed classes with an IEP finally this past Jan after MANY, MANY months of testing.  He is doing fantastic in school now, he got a 100% on his last 6 spelling tests.  He tested at a much higher grade level for his math, so that is wonderful for him.  The only problem with math is that if he knows that he is being timed on what he is doing he struggles, he cant handle the time restraint, although if they dont tell him he is being timed he flies right through with flying colors within the time limit.  The IEP was a godsent for him, I cant believe the difference this has made.

   Anyway Cayden has been saving up his money for 4+ years now for a 4 wheeler and last weekend his dream of a 4 wheeler came true.  I LOVE watching the excitment in his face and the joy that he experiences just knowing he saved all HIS money for that.  He was covered HEAD TO TOE in mud by the time he was done riding.   Although last night he had a breakdown because he wanted an Ipod and didnt have all his money anymore so it took alot of explaining. 

   I will try to write often, my goal with this Blog is to help people understand.

Thanks for reading, Emie